I have to
do these things myself
stand up
sit down
take my pill
undo
turn inside out
tie the tongue up
wait my turn
embitter
get a grip
rise to occasion
have gander
goose
neck
take
off my pants
moon
wipe
waggle
wake
and
all
angelic
levitate
brush
pegs
and
fur
let
steam off
when
pressed
have
a scrub
chow
down
lay
back
get
tummy rubbed
and
charm myself
drift
dream
wash
with tide
and
sink a little
bob
up
keep
afloat
condole
apologize
feel
the hot breath
of
the ancients
weigh
like a nightmare
at
times
face
demons
mourn
and
make
up lies
point
truth
find
choir spot
restring
harp
give
shirt off back
cloud
trousered then
be
birthday boy
stand
up
sit
down
and
eulogize
rub
out the line in the sand
start
again
go
crazy
really
mean it
there
isn't time to polish shoes
give
that the heart is just this once
be
ten foot tall with love
I
have to do these things myself
I'll
tie my own shoelaces one day
(Not sure if this really works for godsbother ... to the extent that it's about free will [i.e things gods can't do for you] it might. I want this collection to have range but I also want it to have coherence. There's a danger of it all becoming too abstract or getting stuck on a narrow set of symbols. So something with a lot of diverse and quick-shifting imagery seems like a good idea, to break up the rhythm, just not sure if this is it or if I should be conjuring up a series like this, that would probably chime in at intervals, rather than bunching up as a section.)
Note that I had not at all intended to focus first on the work for godsbother, it's just what's happening.
Good poem, Kit. How would you define 'godsbother'?
ReplyDeletea set of observations that might bother gods
ReplyDeleteI see. Observations. Not actions.
Deletecan you suggest the kinds of actions you'd have in mind?
DeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteI believe that the gods have always walked among us and they still walk among us, so I don't know of any observations we mortals could make about anything (including them) that would bother them, who are, I think, impervious to most feelings about us except for maybe pity.
DeleteWhat actions they pity the most is probably our destruction of the environment, our hubris (of course), and our increasing incapacity to love anyone but ourselves. And maybe, just maybe, our society's general disdain for the imaginal, for the Spirit, and for the various mysteries.
All of which probably sounds quite daft.
A godbother is generally a pejorative term, right? Someone who bothers others with their talk of the divine. So just asking, who and what are you addressing in these poems?
I’m also finding myself working on one section. I think the poem works very well for godbother (another great title) and the snappy imperatives in this make it quite different to other poems in the section so far - it works for me. I just have to say that I now have this song on running repeat in my head (it’s okay - I love Radiohead): https://youtu.be/HA_burPl6z0
ReplyDeletePersonally, I’d remove the last 2 lines of the poem which would also strengthen the theme. I particularly like the two lines before it (penultimate stanza) and ending there would have more punch (for me at least). But if you keep the last lines, it’s not clear why they’re separated from the rest of the poem.
yes, I don't think those two stray lines are the ending... I think the ending's already there (as you observed)... but they're kind of connected ... so I wasn't quite ready to cut them loose yet... maybe a link to something somewhere else ... not sure
ReplyDeletesomehow I'd like the whole thing to be a little wilder and more challenging, especially grammatically