Tuesday, January 3, 2017

Kerri Shying #1 Gin


I often miss the airline tickets
came by email  by the postman  miss

calling the accountant saying
Cahya can I get some money  just until

next Tuesday   now   all this booking on the countrylink
lining up the State Rail  palls    pallid cousin to that

 falling  into cabs   the giggling fits   who has the
cabcharge  and three of them like flags

wave  along the back seat    divvying it up  that was
worth the   rare moments of tedious

explanation  the sniffer dogs going round at
Canberra airport like moo cows on the Rotolactor

so sure that your luggage will come up
trumps  it was the world before  the world

before   before the word stopped meaning
you held the winning card


  1. Greetings Kerri :) Some great humour here, no doubt still it's serious thing working the airport though. I love the finale and the winning card idea.

  2. you are the mistress of the killer cadence, Kez
    ... the kaleidoscopic thing is really working here ...
    the frequent problem with the kaleidoscopic thing is not landing anywhere
    but yr the cat dropped from the skyscraper cause some sadistic bastard thought he'd try it out - and it's true - you always do land on yr feet

    1. LOL. I think the last two lines should be on my gravestone Kit, it describes my life!

  3. I like the rhythm, I enjoy the humor, just one question: I’m wondering if it’s necessary to start with “I often miss“, could we be projected immediately into the “spinning machine” without this kind of introduction and directly feel dizzy and disoriented …

    1. Yes I think you are right about that. I am so new to drafting and do think that pinning some of these more dizzy pieces to a central 'maypole' might be a good plan. I will be at that. tx

  4. I agree with Béatrice about the first three words - though they don’t hurt it too much, I think starting with the airline tickets draws us more directly in. My favourite part is

    "the sniffer dogs going round at
    Canberra airport like moo cows on the Rotolactor”

    But the whole poem works really well for me overall - like Kit, I love the kaleidoscopic nature of it, and also how you manage forward motion through the rotation (which is kind of what he said but less metaphoric!).

  5. Thanks guys. I am sure there is another stanza out there somewhere that clicks into this. I think it makes it clearer that this is a paid sex trip - or perhaps leaving that in the wings makes the miasma closer.