Monday, January 9, 2017

Jeff Skewes #2 Begin


No religion every day
philosophy chant

Rumi to Rimbaud
saint guru

holy name
bring attention

to life's
highlight

dance on plates
bon voyage

heaven's not

a catalogue







_________________________________________________________________________


I posted the below version last year on 365+1
titled as  'Start don't begin'.

and redrafted the latest above for 52


No religion everyday
philosophy
Rimbaud to Rumi
cuts attention too!

the highlight
of the high-life
is to look up
dancing on plates

heaven's not a catalogue


(Aug 2016)




3 comments:

  1. I like the revised version much better. I think the restructuring gives the words more space and allows the ideas to unfurl more slowly, and the changes to the diction are an improvement too.

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  2. Yes. I prefer it too. The new one fairly dances along!

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  3. philosophy's too hard for some
    for those too boring for a story
    prose for those who lack poetry's spark

    as for myself
    I believe I believe
    I'm the heretic you burn
    I'm the pages you set to ash

    ReplyDelete